


your hands are tough (but they are where mine belong)

by defenceless



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Cuddling & Snuggling, Didn't Know They Were Dating, Domestic Fluff, Fluff, Harry Styles - Freeform, Holding Hands, Louis Tomlinson - Freeform, Louis Tomlinson Wears Harry Styles's Clothes, M/M, Meet-Cute, Pining, Sharing a Bed, Short One Shot, Smitten Harry Styles, Strangers to Friends to Lovers, They meet in a Bus
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-14
Updated: 2020-11-14
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:15:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27558934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/defenceless/pseuds/defenceless
Summary: Blue, extremely blue eyes blinked up at him in confusion, the boy’s gaze lost for a moment and covered in traces of sleep. He was barely opening his mouth to speak when the owner of those pretty eyes gasped loudly, leaning backwards quickly. “Oh my god.” He seemed mortified. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to.” He shook his head, cheeks turning a nice shade of pink at Harry’s gaze. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep on you, I’m so sorry, I truly didn’t realise…”“Hey.” Harry interrupted his rambling, those blue eyes looking at him with a slight frown on them. He dropped his hand from his shoulder, tugging his headphones out of his ears as he spoke again. “Don’t worry about it, it’s okay.” Both boys stared at each other, Harry being the blushing one when he thought of the words he was going to say after that. “Um. Actually, I kind of overheard you before on the phone and I remembered this was your stop, that’s why I woke you up. I’m sorry.”Or, the one where Louis falls asleep in a bus and Harry is there to catch him.
Relationships: Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson
Comments: 53
Kudos: 215





	your hands are tough (but they are where mine belong)

**Author's Note:**

> Hi there!
> 
> This story is 100% pure and unadulterated fluff (is anyone surprised? I'm not) and two boys being totally gone for each other. That's it.
> 
> Thank you so much to [andy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/outropeace/pseuds/outropeace) for always listening to my rambling about any story I think about and to arely, lucia, aliss and nini for supporting everything I do.
> 
> Happy reading!
> 
> (Title is from “Ours” by Taylor Swift).

Harry didn’t like taking the bus. 

In fact, he hadn’t taken it since his first year of college, and even back then, he had only ridden it twice. The first one for getting to know the route in case he ever needed it and the second because the study group he was in wanted to eat somewhere after their weekly meetup, and it was late, and _god forbid_ they had to walk more steps than the necessary. 

It wasn’t like he had something against buses, per se. He just didn’t particularly enjoy them, preferred a thousand times more to be able to stretch his legs while walking and look up and see stars instead of an old bus ceiling above him. Maybe buses were for other people, just not for him. Especially _not_ for him, not after he sat for hours straight through several lectures and his back ended up hurting when the day came crashing down on him like a heavy weight falling atop his shoulders.

That was why he sighed deeply when his last class of the day ran for more time than it normally would, his professor rambling about marketing strategies and how they were present in every single detail of their lives, even if it was unknown to them. Harry usually loved that class, was always focused and interested on how everything that surrounded him had more to it than what meets the eye. 

But he didn’t love it to the point where he would be pleased to skip his daily night walk just to hear more of its history.

He was gripping onto the pole above him lightly, fingers wrapped loosely around it except for when the bus stopped and his hold tightened to avoid swaying, just like in that moment. Harry raised his head when he heard steps walk towards one of the exits in the bus, leaving some seats empty behind them. He threw a glance at the route screen on the front, releasing the pole when he realised he still had several stops to go until he got to his usual one and walking towards one of the recently left seats in the middle, sitting down next to a boy that was turned towards the window by his side and talking in the phone a bit loudly.

He paid him no mind, untangling his headphones to put on some music and hopefully tune out the guy a bit until he had to get down.

It didn’t last long.

Harry’s eyes drifted from the back of the seat in front of him towards the boy by his side, gaze catching on his vanilla converse cladded feet that were tapping rhythmically against the floor. He smiled when he saw they had tiny doodles on the side of the white sole, a heart drawn with a sharpie and a phrase in french his mind couldn’t translate.

He wasn’t focusing on the music anymore, somehow having tuned it out in the last seconds and instead hearing the stranger’s voice over it. He was still speaking on the phone. “Yeah, I’m already on my way there…” The guy said, a small yawn escaping his lips. “No, don’t worry, ‘m not too tired. I really need to get this done anyway, so… it’s Gilmore street, right?” Someone on the other side replied, making him hum, voice sounding tired when he spoke again. “‘Kay, see you soon.”

Harry was still thinking in the french words scribbled on his feet.

After a few minutes of silence he closed his eyes, laying back on his seat while the low crooning of music made its way through his ears and got him to relax the tiniest bit. He was wondering if it would be too bad if he let himself take a small nap while he arrived at his street when he felt a pressure on his shoulder and something tickling softly on the side of his neck.

His eyes opened slowly, body unmoving as he lowered his gaze and saw that the boy’s tired voice wasn’t just for show and he had _actually_ fallen asleep, head placed so lightly atop his jacket he was sure he hadn’t meant to slide to his side enough for it to happen. Harry hadn’t looked at his face when he was awake and he was regretting it, eyes catching at the smallest pieces they could reach with the boy’s face facing downwards. 

It wasn’t everyday that a cute, _cute_ boy ended up nestled against him, light brown hair falling onto his closed eyes as he shifted the slightest bit towards Harry, as if he were looking for something to keep him warm. 

As he looked down at him, he remembered how he was almost slurring while speaking before. Harry didn’t have the heart to wake him up, and after a few seconds he decided he wouldn’t, mind recalling the street he said he would get down on and noticing they still had some stops to get there. God knew he knew how bad it was to be so tired you ended up collapsing anywhere that seemed appropriate to sleep on.

So he just busied himself with the string of his headphones, tangling it between his fingers as he tried moving the least he could to avoid waking up the boy beside him, lowering the volume of his music when he felt him stir a bit in his sleep.

It was way sooner than he thought when he saw Gilmore street flash on the screen at the front, waiting for a few seconds until the bus stopped to wake the boy up. He raised his opposite arm, hand squeezing the guy’s shoulder softly as to not startle him.

He really, _really_ wasn’t expecting what happened after that.

Blue, extremely blue eyes blinked up at him in confusion, the boy’s gaze lost for a moment and covered in traces of sleep. He was barely opening his mouth to speak when the owner of those pretty eyes gasped loudly, leaning backwards quickly. “Oh my god.” He seemed mortified. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to.” He shook his head, cheeks turning a nice shade of pink at Harry’s gaze. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep on you, I’m so sorry, I truly didn’t realise…”

“Hey.” Harry interrupted his rambling, those blue eyes looking at him with a slight frown on them. He dropped his hand from his shoulder, tugging his headphones out of his ears as he spoke again. “Don’t worry about it, it’s okay.” Both boys stared at each other, Harry being the blushing one when he thought of the words he was going to say after that. “Um. Actually, I kind of overheard you before on the phone and I remembered this was your stop, that’s why I woke you up. I’m sorry for eavesdropping.” He ended, a grimace making its way to his face.

The boy finally tore his eyes away from Harry, looking confusedly at his surroundings outside the window, feeling the knot on his chest getting loose when he recognised the streets and he saw the screen flashing Gilmore street at the front. He sighed in relief, gaze returning to Harry. “Oh, don’t apologise for that, god, I’m so glad you overheard. Sometimes not being the subtlest speaker ever comes in handy.” Harry smiled at that, the smaller boy returning it in a softer way. “I’m sorry, again. And thank you so much for being so nice, seriously.”

“Anytime.”

He finally stood up, walking towards the middle of the bus and towards the doors before stopping when he was about to step out, head tilting sideways to meet Harry’s eyes. “Nice to meet you.”

“You too.”

They shared a last smile, the boy waving at him with one of his hands, stepping out of the bus right after.

If there was something Harry hadn’t expected to come out of a lecture ending late and leading him to take the bus, was to meet someone who was possibly the prettiest boy he had ever placed his eyes on in his entire life.

[ ♡ ]

Despite his best efforts to ignore it, Harry’s feet had a mind of their own. He guessed that was why he was walking back to the bus stop on a perfectly normal day, where class had ended just in time, not a minute more or a minute less. 

And still, there he was. 

When he got there, it still hadn’t arrived, but people were already crowding up relatively quickly. He eyed them curiously, gaze never lingering on them for more than a few seconds before moving on to the next person.

As he boarded up, he thought he saw a blur of brown hair passing by the corner of his eye.

It didn’t take him long to realise he had probably imagined it.

He wondered if he had made up the boy in his mind and it was all a figment of his dreams.

[ ♡ ] 

The next time they met, Louis was fairly sure he was daydreaming it.

He truly didn’t expect to see the boy he quite literally used as a pillow again. His cheeks still flamed up in embarrassment whenever he thought of it, eyes squeezing shut tightly to get the memory out of his head. 

Hell, he had even started avoiding taking the bus. Not immediately, because the day after it happened the boy wasn’t there. But he did so a few days later after he got to the bus stop and saw him standing almost at the front, stomach twisting inside him before he turned away and walked towards his small flat instead.

 _The good thing about living in a city practically made up by students_ , Louis thought, _is that everything is near._ Which was a blessing in his situation, his daily routine quickly adapting to the change from laying in the bus seats to hearing his feet crunching on the autumn leaves beneath them when he walked, not really paying attention to his surroundings besides periodically glancing in front of him to make sure he didn’t run into anyone before raising his head again towards the sky, looking at the stars above him.

He had always loved the universe, but he had never quite realised how close enough it was to him, the night sky making him feel like he was in some sort of fairytale. Or even an old, homemade movie, wind blowing slowly as he burrowed into his cream colored sweater. He looked at the front again for a second, smiling happily when he saw it was free of people in front of him, eyes raising again as soon as he did.

That was why he shrieked in surprise when a tall, warm body collided into his own, almost sending him flying against the pavement had it not been for two big hands gripping his waist tightly, sweater bunching up at the strength of it.

“I’m so sorry.” The person spoke, voice deep. Louis’ eyes widened when he heard it, raising up from the floor so quickly he was sure they would get stuck looking upwards. “A bike bumped into me.” The bus boy was scanning his entire body frantically, as if he were making sure he didn’t get injured with the push. “I truly didn’t mean to…” He stopped when he got to his face, eyes focusing on it for a second before he spoke again. “Hey. I know you.”

Louis could feel his entire face pinch in embarrassment, mouth tilted sideways. He was sure he looked like someone had painted over his cheeks with pink paint. “Hi.”

“Hi.” The boy smiled at him, dimples appearing on both cheeks. “Not too tired today?”

Louis wanted to crawl a hole inside the earth and weep there.

“Oh my god.” He let out a breathy laugh, more air than sound in it. “No, not at all.” Louis dropped his face in the direction of their shoes, avoiding the boy’s eyes. “I’m still so, so sorry about that.”

The boy laughed at it too, something that sounded like it had been pulled from deep inside his chest and had Louis looking up again, eyes going back to his face and jaw tilting up with the motion. He was tall, taller than him. He realised he had to do that to glance into his eyes properly. “I’m just teasing you. I told you that day, I didn’t mind.”

“Why?” Louis squinted his eyes at him curiously. “Do you normally have people falling asleep onto you?”

The guy bent down a bit, the movement bringing them closer. Louis could feel his converse scruffing against the pavement behind them. “Do you normally fall asleep onto people?”

Louis tilted his head to the side at the question, blinking slowly. “No. Not really.” They stood there for a beat before the boy took a small step back, Louis’ hands falling from where they had gripped onto his forearms. The warmth surrounding his waist disappeared, making him shudder. “I’m Louis.”

“I’m Harry.”

They both stayed in silence for a few seconds, Louis’ eyes moving nervously from him to follow a dog being walked by his owner behind Harry, tiny paws making a clicking sound against the pavement. The sight made Harry’s smile soften. “You like dogs?”

“I like all kinds of animals.” Louis shrugged, eyes still glued to the tiny creature. “I love cats more, though.”

Harry felt a weird urge to tug the boy between his arms. He cleared his throat, hands clasping behind his back. “Me too. I really like them.”

Louis’ eyes returned to him when he said that, baby blues positively shimmering at the statement. His voice had an excited undertone to it. “I have one.” He bounced on the balls of his feet, the small movement catching Harry’s attention. “Maybe you could meet it someday.”

“I would love to.” The taller boy smiled, leaning into his space once more when another bike passed behind them, bringing the two of them close again. “Are you doing anything right now?”

Louis nodded softly. “Was just gonna study a bit in a café a few blocks from here.” He raised a hand, thumb finger pointing towards the road in front of them. “Their hot chocolate is to _die_ for.”

It was Harry’s turn to tilt his head. “L’aurore?”

“Yeah.” Louis mirrored his expression, smile making its way to his face again, pointy fangs pressing down slightly on his bottom lip. “You know it?”

“Like the back of my hand.” Harry lowered his gaze, noting the vanilla converse in Louis’ feet. It was all the push he needed to look at his eyes again, decision made. “Hey. Let me buy you something from there. It’s the least I can do after what happened today.”

If Louis wasn’t sure he was daydreaming before that was the moment when he almost convinced himself he was, nails digging into his palm as he curled one of his hands in a fist to confirm that he was _very_ awake, toes curling inside his shoes as a result to the bundle of nerves that appeared inside his stomach, his entire body feeling weirdly tingly at having the whole, undivided attention from this boy that seemed ripped out of an old book, all dark curly hair and never ending fingers cladded in rings that were clinging weakly onto his black backpack straps. “Shouldn’t I be the one offering? You know, since I’m the one who…” He trailed off, cheeks tinting pink again. “Fell asleep onto you before.”

“I quite literally _fell_ onto you earlier.” Harry dismissed his words, noting the way the boy seemed to get nervous whenever that situation came up. He filed his reaction away inside his mind for later. “It’s no problem. And we can talk more about your cat, too.”

“Its name is Andy.” Louis added, fingers fiddling for a second before nodding, eyelashes fluttering when he looked up at Harry. “‘Kay. But you’ll quiz me on the stuff I have to review after the cat chat is over.”

Harry beamed at him, pinky finger reaching out to him. “I promise.”

Louis giggled at the sight, the sound leaving his mouth without his permission before lacing their fingers together, tugging Harry’s hand until he could touch the pads of their thumbs without unlinking their pinkies. “It’s sealed, then.” He said, smiling up at him in the same way the other boy was.

Somehow, it felt like it was summer and like sunlight was pouring on them even when the sky was dark and the stars were out. 

It made Louis feel happy.

[ ♡ ]

Harry had underestimated Louis’ power to get stuck in his mind. 

He really shouldn’t have.

He had had a taste of it, back then when he had first seen him in the bus and lost him for some days. But somehow, it was worse after getting to know him. 

Harry knew the boy was pretty, had seen it first hand and even way more up close than others surely had noticed too when they first took a glance at him, that first memory of him quickly becoming one he revisited when he felt like the academic stress was taking too much of a toll in his life. It was a nice escaping place where all he felt was warmth and happiness, even for a little bit before it all came down tumbling onto him and making him down cups of coffee to at least be able to keep his eyes open.

The thing he had failed to notice at first glance was how Louis’ pretiness went way beyond the way he looked.

It was in everything he did, from the way he talked with his hands and soft voice to the way he always smiled when he saw Harry waiting for him outside the building where he took his last lecture on wednesdays, a smile that seemed to be reserved for him only, full of sleepy dreamy eyes that somehow never lost the small glint of happiness the boy seemed to carry with him everywhere he went.

Harry raised his free hand, waving at Louis as he stepped onto the stairs that led up to the entrance of the old building before making his way there in long steps, stopping just before climbing the first one. He waited until Louis stepped down towards him, the boy standing on the last step before reaching the ground, the height added making him be able to look straight into Harry’s eyes. “Hello, future CEO.”

“Hello.” Harry smiled when he felt Louis’ smaller hands reach out to him, gripping his backpack strings before he covered them with his own. “How is my favourite designer in the world today?”

The boy let out a tiny sound on the back of his throat, almost folding into himself at Harry’s words, hands tightening on the straps. “Hungry.” _More nervous than hungry, actually. You make me nervous._ “You?”

“Was hoping you were, cause I am.” Harry rubbed his thumbs on the back of Louis’ hands absentmindedly. “Wanna come back to mine? I can make something quick for us.”

Louis groaned sadly, letting himself fall forward until his face was tucked against Harry’s neck. “I wish I could. Have a big assignment to do for tomorrow.” His voice sounded pained, almost whine-like. It was something he usually did when he complained about stuff he didn’t necessarily hate, but didn’t enjoy too much either.

It made Harry smile, hands sliding from in between them until he was hugging Louis around the middle. “Let’s go to yours, then. I can cook there, you work on your project, I get to see Andy. It’s a win-win situation for everyone.”

Louis threw his head back a bit, just enough to see Harry’s eyes. “You really think that?”

“Yes?”

“Oh, I’m gonna break your heart.” The boy rested his face against Harry’s shoulder again, humming into the wool of his coat. “I don’t think Andy wants to see you too, Harry.”

Both of them chuckled softly at his words, Harry’s hold on him tightening for a few seconds while they did. 

When he was with Louis, it was like everything fell into place. Almost as if he had been the missing piece he never realised he needed but once he did, became his favourite among the ones that made up the puzzle that was his life.

[ ♡ ]

“You’re going to stain that rug.”

Louis was pacing back and forth on the floor in front of his bed, Harry leaning against the wall behind the head part of it and watching him from there, plush duvet fluffing around his tall figure. “ _Louis.”_

The boy ignored him again, blue stained water sloshing dangerously close to the edge of the vintage cup he was holding between his hands, threatening to turn the white rug beneath his socked feet into a _white-with-weirdly-watered-down-blue-stains_ one. Harry played with the watch on his left wrist for a few seconds, eyes sliding from Louis’ moving figure to the fingers fiddling mindlessly on his hand.

He was in the middle of fastening his watch again after having taken it out when his movements came to a halt, mind remembering the term he had once called Louis just to get his attention back when he was also worrying, but wouldn’t even say a peep about it. It was something he wasn’t expecting to say, the endearment slipping out of his mouth like a second nature. And maybe it was, because it was a word he unconsciously started using when referring to Louis inside of his mind. “Baby.”

The word worked, Louis’ movements stilling as soon as he heard it, echoing around the room and making his gaze go from in front of him to Harry, bottom lip sliding out in a pout. “I’m gonna die.”

“Why?” Harry scooted over to the edge of the bed, long legs hanging from the side of it, arms reaching out to take the cup from Louis’ hands. “Tell me.”

“I have to do a project for tomorrow.” Louis’ eyes seemed tired, long eyelashes brushing the top of his cheekbones when he lowered his gaze at Harry. “Remember the illustration class I told you about?”

“Mhm.”

“For that one. He told us today and it was completely out of nowhere and I have no idea of what I’m gonna do.” Louis whined, brows furrowing and eyes closing sadly. Harry knew he was overexaggerating like he always did.

It didn’t mean it hurt any less.

He hummed, Louis moving closer until he was standing between his spread open legs, Harry’s free hand twitching with the sudden urge to touch the boy in front of him, to tug him down and sit him on top of one of his thighs. He curled it into a fist, laying it atop said thigh. “What’s the project?”

“I have to draw something.” Louis huffed, arms crossing. “He wants to see our progress since the term started. But I’ve seen nothing that makes me wanna _draw.”_

 _You’re such a liar, Louis,_ his mind told him, almost making him grimace. _You’re looking exactly at it._

Harry blinked at him before speaking, voice soft. “You need to breathe.” He stood up, hand finally uncurling and squeezing Louis’ waist delicately, turning them around to switch their places and pushing him down onto the bed, roles reversed. “You’re overthinking it.”

Louis was looking up at him with puppy eyes, jaw tilting upwards. Harry had noticed it was something he did a lot whenever they were together. 

He had been noticing a lot of little things Louis did. It made something tug inside his chest, making something almost painful blossom at the sight of the boy following his eyes like a magnet, even if that meant either standing on his tiptoes or tilting his head in a perfect way just like that.

Harry limited himself to walking outside the room, leaving the cup on the kitchen counter before going back empty handed, passing Andy in the living room ignoring its hisses at him, closing the door when he entered the room.

Louis had climbed onto bed already, back leaning against the fluffy pillows at the top. He was looking down at the hem of his sweater, fingers playing with it, picking apart the small strands of fine material that poked out of it when he heard Harry enter again. He raised his head to look at him, letting himself pout again in his direction, not dropping it even when the boy settled beside him, his head following the movement with the pout intact on his lips.

He almost let it slip when Harry spoke again, the deep drawl of his voice and the small look he shot him making it feel like he was going to become a puddle of softness atop the sheets at any moment. “Stop being…”

“Being what?”

Harry’s look was saying _‘really?’_ even when his mouth said something else, gaze incredulous. “Being cute. I can’t focus on brainstorming to try and help you when you get like this.” _Because I think more in trying to find ways to kiss you instead of the current problem at hand._

Louis sputtered at his words, fingers coming to a halt where they were still toying with his sweater before looking away, Harry’s eyes becoming too much for him to handle. He normally couldn’t completely deal with his gaze, and he wasn’t about to start trying while being incredibly stressed at the same time.

Both boys sat there in silence, Harry breaking it after a few minutes passed. “Maybe you could draw Andy?”

“Andy is mad at me.” Louis lamented himself, sliding down on the bed until he was completely laying on his back, ignoring Harry’s eyes on him. “And it won’t stay still enough for me to do it. I put a lot of attention to details. I can’t do that.”

The blue eyed boy felt Harry’s fingers touch his hair lightly, brushing through it delicately, throwing the strands of it that fell onto his eyes back. “Why is Andy mad at you?”

Louis’ mind was drowsy with sleep when he replied, voice small. “Nothing really important.” _Because I keep talking about you and I’m faintly sure it’s jealous of you and actually hates you now._ “You should go home, Harry. I’m probably gonna spend the whole night doing this.” He sat up again, eyes blinking slowly at the boy beside him before his hands were picking at the edge of his sweater again.

He almost squealed when Harry leaned forward, hands falling onto each side of his hips. “Come here.” His long ringed fingers slid underneath the belt hoops on his jeans, tugging and sliding him up the bed until their thighs were touching, side by side. It felt like his skin was burning, like Harry’s touch was burning him despite the fact that they had layers of clothes separating them. “I want to help you. I can stay here and still study, don’t worry about me.”

Louis tugged his bottom lip between his teeth, biting it worriedly. “But…”

Harry’s eyes gave him a quick look, scanning over his body in a way that made Louis shudder underneath his sweater, the colour of Harry’s eyes matching it perfectly, deep forest green being everything he could focus on. The boy tugged on his belt hoops again, hands finally clutching his sides with enough strength to drag him forward. Harry was looking at him with an expression so soft and so focused it made Louis’ fingers still where they were tangling on his sweater, pulling him again by his hips until his legs were placed on either side of his body, sitting completely on his lap. 

“Talk to me. Why is it bothering you so much?”

Louis felt himself getting nervous at his undivided attention, big hands moving from his hips to his waist, hold still tight. He looked down briefly before replying, noting how they seemed to engulf his entire middle, hard rings clashing against the soft material of his sweater without looking out of place. His voice was shy, a tiny, soft thing that had Harry clutching him even tighter between his hands, a sudden sense of protectiveness washing over his body when he heard it. “I’m just…” Louis took a deep breath, Harry’s cologne making his head feel dizzy. “I’m nervous. I really don’t want to mess this up.”

“Why would you mess it up?” Harry was frowning, but Louis knew he wasn’t mad. The boy could tell his emotions easily now, even when he was someone usually reserved with them. Harry was just curious, head tilting softly as he tried to understand where he was coming from, as if he were a difficult trivia game he couldn’t decipher. “You’re really talented, baby.” One of his hands raised to his hair again, fingers running through it, brushing away a loose strand of fringe and tucking it behind his ear. “You could draw absolutely anything and it would come out looking amazing.”

The boy let out something that sounded an awful lot like a small giggle. “Oh, I know that.” He smiled at the sight of his hands around his waist, cheeks turning the same cherry shade his lips were at the words. He seemed to get distracted for a moment, expression looking coy as his gaze returned to look inside Harry’s eyes. “But still.”

Harry hummed, hand returning to his waist. “The only problem here is you don’t feel inspired, then?”

Louis glanced down again after that, hands coming to rest on top of Harry’s, the coldness from his rings seeping through his skin and blending with it. He didn’t reply to his question, fingertips tracing the outline of them distractedly. The taller boy straightened his back, bringing Louis even closer with the movement. Their chests were pressing together, Louis’ face at Harry’s neck level right where his cologne was the strongest, making him close his eyes briefly. He felt Harry reaching behind him with one of his hands. “What are you doing?”

“Just wanna reach my phone,” he patted on the bed, “see if we find something you like.”

Louis brought one of his hands to his outstretched arm, reaching his shoulder and pushing it backwards the slightest bit. It made Harry’s eyes look back at him, position going at how it previously was. It was there when it dawned on him how much he was straddling him, noticing how he could wrap his legs around the boy’s torso if he wanted because of how furrowed into his lap he was. The image made him remember all the couples he saw on picnic dates at the park near campus, their to-go pose for when they wanted to be as close as possible despite being in public.

But they were behind closed doors, and Harry’s eyes were looking at him in a way that made something warm and ticklish churn inside Louis’ stomach. “Harry.”

“Yes, baby?”

Louis bit his bottom lip, gaze seeming timid when his eyes found Harry’s. “There’s… there is something I wanna draw.”

“There is?” Harry’s voice sounded confused, brows furrowing lightly. “What’s the problem, then?”

The blue eyed boy took a shaky breath, tiny fingers raising up to trace over Harry’s eyebrow softly, just a fluttering touch, making a path to the corner of his eye. Louis felt his hand tremble slightly as he did so, praying in his mind for it to stop. He was sure it was present on his voice too when he spoke again, the pad of his pointer finger tracing his cheekbone, gaze lost on the movement to avoid looking at Harry. “Can I draw your eyes?”

He was reaching the place where he knew Harry’s dimple hid when he felt the boy’s hand fall on top of his, moving it slowly until he could press a close mouthed kiss on the underside of his wrist, where his skin was the softest. Harry spoke with his mouth against it, warm hand encompassing his own as he pressed his open palm on his cheek. “Yes.”

The word made Louis look up. “Are you sure?”

Harry smiled at him, Louis feeling like he was drowning in a deep green ocean when he replied. “You can do anything you want, baby.”

_You could ask me to walk down to the depths of hell and I would do it without questioning it twice._

[ ♡ ]

Louis was going to jump out of his own skin. He was sure it would happen sooner or later. Probably sooner than later.

They had laid backwards on his bed shortly after he finished the drawing, his notebook being squished between them as they got closer, soft whispers filling the tiny, almost invisible space in the middle of their bodies. It didn’t take long until sleep fell upon them like a thick blanket, legs tangling delicately atop the warm duvet and eyelids feeling heavy with sleep until they simply couldn’t move their lips anymore. 

It was the best sleep Louis had had in _months._

He woke up to the sight of Harry’s chest in front of him and Harry’s arm curling around his waist even as he slept and everything was _Harry_ , even when the apartment was his and the room was his and even the goddamn bed they were sleeping in was his and not Harry’s. It was like he fit in all the empty corners of his life, in all the dips on the mattress and all the wrinkly lines of his duvet. And it was like Louis fit right in between his arms in a way that felt so perfect and so _right_ , almost as if he had been made for Harry to hold him and no one else. It had him nuzzling to the boy even closer, just to feel the soft rise of his chest underneath his cheek when he breathed in. 

Harry held him tighter unconsciously, as if he internally agreed with the thoughts Louis didn’t dare to voice out loud.

 _Just this time,_ he thought. _Just let yourself have this once._

Turns out, it wasn’t that easy. 

Because that _once_ turned into _the whole day_ when he tugged Harry’s sweater on him without thinking much of it, boys already running late after they said their goodbyes and it didn’t dawn on him until much, much later. He didn’t notice it when he saw Harry walk out of the door with only his shirt, and the implications that him wearing his sweater had didn’t come to mind until someone pointed it out to him as a lecture was about to start, eyebrows raising playfully as they asked him if the ‘ _boy that picked him up everyday and him had finally started dating’,_ giving one of his sleeves a tug as he blushed and muttered what he hoped was an enough convincing denial.

It was one thing that he had a massive unrequited love for his best friend. It was _another_ thing when people thought said love was requited.

So he was not only thinking about how he had slept in the same bed with Harry and he had _liked_ it, but now he was also thinking in the fact that he had been prancing around in his sweater _all day_ and people had noticed, paying enough attention to point it out and tell him how they were _really cute together._

It didn’t help that he was also supposed to meet up with the exact same owner of said sweater to study together. He groaned softly, head dropping onto his hands as he tried to find a way to disguise the _very_ impregnated smell of Harry’s cologne onto him before they saw each other.

Yeah, he wasn’t having the best day.

And it only got worse from there, almost as if the realisation had put a curse on him. He got to their usual library completely soaked, white sneakers making a funny squeaky sound on the wood floor as he approached the table tucked almost at the back where he knew Harry would be waiting for him on, books sprawled and a cup of warm coffee by his side, one of hot chocolate by the chair Louis had claimed as his own.

He felt Harry’s eyes snap towards him as soon as he dropped his bag on the floor beneath him, the sound of it echoing in the big room. Louis wasn’t exactly worried about bothering anyone since it was very late and the place was practically empty except for both of them, lips curling into an attempted pout just as his eyes found Harry’s, arms reaching out to him weakly.

Harry was out of his seat as soon as he caught sight of the small movement, walking up to the boy until he let his head fall onto his shoulder. His voice had a worried tint to it. “I told you to take an umbrella.”

“I forgot.”

“Why did you forget?”

 _Because my mind is stuck in a loop of you and nothing else._ “I don’t know. Was too tired.” Harry nuzzled the side of his face with his own, Louis shivering when he felt his warm cheek touch his cold skin. “I’m freezing.”

“Can’t have you freezing.” The boy pulled back, something that felt an awful lot like fondness spreading through his chest at the sight of Louis chasing after his touch blindly, eyes closed. Harry took hold of his chin with his hand, raising it up towards his face softly, Louis’ blue eyes opening tiredly at the movement. “Let’s go back to mine.”

“But we need to study.”

“We can study there.” Harry framed his face with both hands after that, thumbs rubbing soothingly at his cheeks. “You’re really cold, baby. You’re gonna freeze even more if you stay in these clothes.”

Louis hummed, lips pouting again when he heard his last words. “I’m sorry.”

Harry frowned, hands still cupping his cheeks. “You did nothing wrong.”

“I got your sweater all wet…” Louis’ face fell downwards towards his chest, words mumbled like it took everything in him to say them.

That was when Harry finally, _finally_ looked down too and saw that, in fact, he was all wrapped up in the sweater he had forgotten back at his flat, wool looking wet and heavy and sticking uncomfortably to Louis’ skin. 

The sight made something curl inside of him. 

_Want._

Want laced with a weird, deep desire of wishing they were in a crowded place instead of in an empty library, just so he would be able to say: ‘ _See? This is the prettiest boy in the world and he’s wearing my clothes.’_

He never thought he was the kind of guy that had a _thing_ for seeing other people wearing what was his. All it took for him to realise it was to see someone he was head over heels for doing it to decide that maybe, _maybe_ he did. 

“I don’t mind.” Harry replied after a few seconds, shaking his head. “I’m glad you had it. Would probably be more worried than I am now if you had been under the pouring rain without nothing else on top.”

Louis rolled his eyes, cheeks warm under Harry’s hands. “‘Under the pouring rain’, God. So sappy, Harry.”

“So pretty, Louis.”

“See? So sappy…” Louis rolled his eyes again without any malice behind it, making Harry laugh at his tone and squeeze his cheeks with both hands until his lips were puckering in a fish shaped way. 

He drew Louis closer to him, his own lips falling atop his forehead and pressing them in a small kiss on it, feeling the boy take a shaky breath at their closeness. He took a step back after it, hands sliding down to the sides of Louis’ neck, whose eyes had gone a bit hazy. “Let’s get you home.”

[ ♡ ]

Louis was pacing again, but this time it was inside Harry’s bathroom.

His hands were clutching a fluffy white towel tightly around his shoulders, teeth clattering slightly at the cold air in the room, the warmth the shower had given him disappearing quickly.

His eyes kept wandering towards the small stack of clothes folded neatly atop the mirror counter, eyes squinting at them when his steps finally came to a halt.

Was he exaggerating?

He shook his head, walking up to it, one hand falling to the hoodie placed at the top, fingers stroking the fabric to try and soothe the nerves bubbling inside of him.

It was nothing, right? Just a friend lending him clothes because his own got wet. That was it.

It didn’t feel like nothing.

It felt like something _big._ He liked to put the blame of his feelings on all the romance movies he had grown up watching, claiming they raised him to be the hopeless romantic he was. Deep, deep inside him, he knew he _was_ one, but he also knew he would be lying to himself if he said that was the only reason why it felt like his heart would come out of his chest whenever Harry so much glanced at him.

He wondered if it was too late to ask for his wet clothes back. 

The boy realised it was when he heard a small knock on the door, the sound making him jump slightly before hearing Harry’s muffled voice through the wood. “You alright, baby?”

Louis let out a shaky breath at the pet name. “Yeah.”

“I threw your clothes in the wash, think they’ll be ready a bit later.”

“Oh.” Louis’ hand curled into a fist, gripping the hoodie tightly. He was so endeared it physically hurt him. “Thank you, Harry.”

Harry hummed. “No worries. Come out when you’re ready.”

He heard his steps back away from the door, probably retreating back to the sofa in the living room. Louis sighed when he finally couldn’t hear him anymore, his other hand letting the towel fall to the floor and grabbing the hoodie with both of them, tugging it on quickly on him.

Might as well.

When he went out of the bathroom he was tiptoeing, not wanting his sock clad feet to get dirty even if he knew the floor was spotless clean. He took a few steps until he reached the kitchen after realising Harry wasn’t in the living room, finding the boy looking inside a pot on the lit up stove and stirring at it every few seconds.

Louis walked up to him silently, eyeing the stove curiously from behind his back. “What are you doing?”

Harry didn’t even seem surprised at him, body crouching down a bit so he could get a better view on what was going on at the front. “Hot chocolate.”

“Hmmm.” Louis hooked his chin on top of Harry’s shoulder, cheek squishing against his side. “Sounds good.”

“Gonna taste more than good.” Harry turned off the stove, turning around to face Louis, the boy jumping a small step backwards at the movement. “Are you feeling better now?”

Louis nodded, feet falling to the floor until he was standing at his normal height. “Kind of.” He shrugged, hoodie sleeping from his frame, sleeves covering his hands to the point where the only visible part of them were the tips of his fingers. “It’s been a shitty day.”

The _until now_ was left unsaid, but it hung heavily between them as they stood in silence after Louis’ words. A few seconds passed before Harry spoke again, hands twitching at his sides. “Would a cuddle help?”

Louis didn’t reply, instead raising onto his tiptoes again until he could wrap his arms around Harry’s neck, the boy’s going to hold him by the waist like it was an automatic response engraved inside his brain. 

Harry swayed them side to side softly before he reached behind him with one of his arms to put the lid on top of the pot to avoid the hot chocolate getting cold, running it down Louis’ back right after. The blue eyed boy spoke, his voice a mere whisper in the middle of the kitchen. “I’m still cold.”

Harry chuckled, the warmth of it making Louis’ stomach swirl at hearing it so close. He tightened his hold on his waist, head leaning against his as he did. “Wanna go to bed?”

Louis’ eyes closed at the words, the night before coming onto him in flashbacks and making him notice how he kept falling head first into situations he knew he shouldn’t fall, because he knew they would hurt when he thought about them again. 

But it was so, _so_ easy to forget that when Harry held him like that.

It almost made him believe that he liked him back.

So who could blame him for nodding at the question, the movement small against the curve between Harry’s neck and shoulder. And he repeated the same thing he had said to himself the day before in his mind as the taller boy walked them in the direction of his bedroom, arms still holding him close.

_Let yourself have this._

He would deal with what worried him once it happened.

[ ♡ ]

They were properly laying in bed this time, cocooned inside the several blankets Harry always took out whenever Louis went over, thrown up all the way to their necks, hair getting messy because of the pillows underneath their heads. And they were still close, so close that Harry was sure he could count Louis’ eyelashes if he wanted to and he could name every single shade of blue that made up the colour of his eyes even when he didn’t have any minimal knowledge on the thousands of them that existed, at least not like Louis did.

He waited until the boy seemed to relax down a bit, body going pliant on the mattress before speaking again. “Why was it a shitty day, baby?”

“Because.” Louis’ eyes found his own tiredly, sleep coming to them easily as they laid there. “I felt thrown off all day because I arrived at my first class with, like, two minutes to spare when I usually have thirty, and the seat I usually take was already taken cause of that. And then I couldn’t catch a bus so I had to walk to the library but I forgot my umbrella so I got all wet and I’m _sure_ I’m gonna catch a cold and you _know_ how much I hate getting sick.” He whined at the end of his rambling, the sentences jambling together with how quickly he spoke, lips pouting in Harry’s direction. Harry noticed he did it a lot, even more lately, either when he was feeling upset or when he wanted to be coddled and held close.

He wondered for a second if he did the same thing when he wanted to be kissed.

“I’m sorry you had a bad day.”

“Don’t be, ‘t wasn’t your fault.” Louis nuzzled his head further into the pillow, brown hair flattening against it. “Tell me about _your_ day. I wanna know.”

Harry reached towards Louis to grab one of his hands, playing with his fingers as he spoke, gaze focusing on them. “I arrived a bit late to my first class, too. Had lunch with a few friends I hadn’t seen, then caught up on some stuff I hadn’t understood about law class. Hm.” Harry looked up then, finding out that Louis’ eyes were looking at their tangled hands too. He waited until they focused on him to speak again. “I saw you in the library, and now we’re here. A pretty good day, after all.”

Louis started playing back with his hand too, lacing their fingers in the space between their bodies. “Something good _did_ happen, now that I think of it. My classmates liked the drawing.” He blushed at the mention of it, looking coy. “Said it was pretty.”

“Just like everything you do.” _Just like you._ “Did _you_ like it, though?”

“Yeah.” Louis gave him a warm smile, hold on his hand tightening. “It isn’t as good as the real thing, obviously, but it turned out good.”

“It turned out _really_ good.” Harry scooted closer to him at the words, dimple appearing on the cheek that wasn't mushed against the pillow. “You like my eyes, then?”

 _I like you._ “They’re nice.” Louis dismissed the question, hands untangling until he could hold Harry’s one by the back of it, palm facing towards him. “I like your hands, too.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know… I think it’s the rings.” He let go of it, moving his hand to the front until their palms were pressing together, fingers looking tiny in comparison with Harry’s ones, chunky rings remarking their size difference even more. “They look cool.”

Harry laced their fingers again slowly. “I like your eyes.” He raised his gaze towards them as he said so, Louis’ eyes already on him. “It’s like you have a little galaxy inside them.”

Louis seemed to perk at that. “Really?”

“Yes.”

“I love space.”

 _I love you._ “Do you?”

“Yep.” Louis’ big eyes blinked at him, eyelashes almost tangling together because of how long they were. “I love stars. And planets.”

Harry seemed to lose all his brain to mouth control filter after that, voice soft and eyes looking at Louis impossibly fond, a look no one else but him would ever get. At least coming from him. “I love when you wear big clothes.”

Louis stuttered at that. “You do?”

The boy hummed, feeling Louis’ fingers trace the outline of his rings with a feather light touch. He wanted to tug him against himself and kiss him until they were both gasping for air. He wanted to fall asleep beside him every night and wake up hugging him every morning. He wanted so _many_ things. He had never been more grateful for the fact that Louis wasn’t a mind reader until that moment. “Yeah.”

“I love your sweaters.” Louis seemed timid at the confession. “I like how they smell.”

“How do they smell?”

Louis wasn’t looking at him anymore, blue eyes getting lost on their fingers again. “Like you.”

Harry held his hand by the back in the same way he had done before, bringing it to his lips, pressing a burning kiss onto Louis’ open palm. “I love when you wear big clothes.”

“You already said that.”

“ _But.”_ Harry kissed it again, the words imprinting themselves onto Louis’ skin. “I love it more when they’re _my_ clothes.”

For the first time since they met, he could watch the blush blossoming on Louis’ cheeks from the start, getting to see how his cheekbones got tinted in a lovely cherry colour that matched his lips perfectly, the sight making him want to pepper his cheeks with kisses until the colour died down. Both boys fell quiet, the only sound being the one of Harry’s rings clicking together when Louis moved his fingers nervously.

“Your hands are so soft.” The toying stopped for a second, long enough for Louis to slide the rings off and set them in the middle of them, careful not to lose them between the sheets. “And warm.”

“I like that yours are cold.”

“Really?”

“Mhm.”

“Why?”

“Because I can hold them to warm them up.” Harry riffled through the rings, letting go of Louis’ hand until he found the smallest one he had and slid it on one of his fingers, skin burning as he did. He put the rest on his own fingers. “There. Now both of our hands look cool.”

Louis let out a soft giggle, an airy little thing that had Harry reaching out to him, fingers tightening around the big hoodie that framed his body before pressing them closer, closer, _closer,_ eyesight going blurry because of it. 

He felt Louis shuffle around for a bit, finally settling down against his neck, lips tickling the skin there as he spoke. “I’m sleepy.”

“Me, too.”

The boy closed his eyes for a few seconds before he opened them wide, head tilting back to look at Harry. “You haven’t studied.”

“I have.”

“Those 10 minutes you got cause I arrived late don’t count.” 

“Everything counts.” Harry retaliated back, lips pecking a sharp cheekbone. “Besides, I would rather lay here with you. Stop worrying about me.”

“Ugh.” Louis settled down, head raising again after a few minutes in silence. “And the hot chocolate…”

“You wanna get out of here?”

“Well, no, but still…”

Louis was about to continue complaining, mouth barely opening again before Harry ducked down and blew a raspberry on the side of his neck, cutting him off effectively and making him dissolve into a fit of tiny giggles which caused him to laugh too, deep and high voice tones mixing together like a perfect harmony under the sheets.

They eventually calmed down, the only thing making any noise being them trying to catch their breaths before Louis furrowed closer to him, eyelashes tickling Harry’s cheek when he looked up at him without raising his head from the place he had claimed as his own on his neck. “Wanna stay in your arms forever.”

_Wanna stay with you forever._

“Gonna hold you forever, then.”

Louis hummed. He was mumbling now, sleep creeping upon him quickly just as Harry’s embrace turned softer, a protectiveness underneath it that made his whole body feel squirmy. “I feel happy with you, Harry.”

“You do, baby?”

“Mhm.” The boy dragged out, lips pursing and pressing a chaste kiss onto the patch of neck skin he could reach. “So happy.”

Harry hid a smile in his hair, chin resting atop his head lightly. “Me too, baby. Me too.”

[ ♡ ]

They always seemed to find each other between the flutter of old book pages and paintings, colder days approaching as the school year seemed to get both of them busier with each passing day, making them walk in opposite directions before eventually finding their way back to wherever the other was with tired sighs and sleepy teary eyes, soft smiles they reserved for each other appearing whenever they could meet. It was like time stopped for a few seconds whenever Louis finally breathed in the taller boy’s cologne, stress weight leaving his shoulders as long arms held him tightly.

Harry was waiting outside the building of his Wednesday lecture like he did every week, leaning against a lamp post which lightened weakly the path of the entrance. He yawned, a small body barrelling into his in the time he closed his eyes.

It was like a little angel had fallen from the sky and ended up between his arms, Louis’ face nuzzling up under the fluffy scarf bunched up around Harry’s neck. 

He hugged in the same way children did when they were barely learning how to walk, pushing all of his weight onto Harry, hands clinging weakly to the back of his coat as a mere reminder of Harry’s presence for himself. Harry’s own went up to cradle delicately the dip of his waist, the back of his neck.

“Hi, baby.”

Louis’ cheeks reddened, the feeling causing him to press his face even tighter against the warm skin of Harry’s neck, voice small. “Hi.”

“Everything good?” The hand at his waist rubbed over it a bit, squeezing him in the lightest way possible, bodies touching from head to toe. “You good?”

“Mhm.” Louis nodded, voice muffled. “Just a bit tired, ‘s all.”

Almost as if in cue, he slumped forward even more, Harry’s grip on his body being the only thing keeping him standing. It made the green eyed boy chuckle, fingers on Louis’ neck tightening and gripping it by behind, throwing his head back with the movement until he could look into his eyes. It made him remember the way cats grabbed their kittens when they were sleepy, looking tiny and so, so soft. “Was gonna take you out, eat something.”

“Can we get takeout instead?” Louis’ blue eyes were glazed over, Harry’s hand moving from the back of his neck to cup his cheek and rub at one of them with the pad of his thumb delicately, eyelashes impossibly long when his eyes fell closed at the touch. “Wanna go home.”

The boy let his head loll to the side, resting it against Harry’s hand with a small smile, pink lips matching the colour at the top of his cheekbones. Harry could have kissed him right there, pulling him in by the jaw and licking into his mouth slowly, finally finding out if Louis tasted as sweet as he looked. He could’ve kissed him like they had all the time in the world to do so.

But he didn’t, instead bringing his other hand up from his waist to brush his fingers through the strands of Louis’ caramel fringe, a feathery touch contrasting roughly with the cold wind starting to blow around them. “Home it is, then.”

Louis’ eyes opened, jaw tilting up as he gripped the front of Harry’s coat, beaming at him. “Take me there.”

[ ♡ ]

Louis had started wearing his clothes.

It wasn’t something any of them noticed at first, Harry being too mesmerised by Louis and Louis being too entranced on Harry to actually pay attention at what belonged to who when they slept over in the other’s flat, Harry’s sweater drawer eventually emptying significantly while Louis’ one got fuller. 

And it wasn’t like it was something conscious, either. At least not the first times. Not for Harry.

He remembered it clearly, the day when his mind paused while in the middle of play fighting with Louis on the bed, limbs tangled in messed up bedsheets and hands reaching out for the other, grip clumsy and shaky with how much they were huffing and laughing. He remembered how it wasn’t until he had pinned Louis down against the mattress while holding his hands together above his head by the wrists that he finally glanced down at his chest properly, big black sweater sliding off of his shoulder and exposing the golden skin on his collarbone. 

It felt like someone had poured a bucket of ice cold water on top of him, mind piecing it all together so quickly his hold on Louis loosened, the boy wriggling from below him and kicking at his chest, tumbling him backwards until their positions had reversed and Louis was fully seated on Harry’s lap, oblivious to the thoughts inside his mind. “I won.”

It took Harry a few seconds to reply back, mouth dry when he seemed to finally find the words to do so. “Like fuck you won.” Louis’ hands were splayed out on his chest, the boy squinting his eyes at him when he heard his voice and bending down until their noses were almost touching, blue eyes full with mischief. Harry felt his whole body shake when he decided to get back at the boy by sliding his hands down the oversized sweater, coming in contact with Louis’ soft skin as he did, the boy being shirtless under the thick sweater. “Get off.”

“No.”

“ _Louis.”_

 _“_ Accept I won and I will.”

“No, you didn’t. Get off.”

Louis’ smile was sugary sweet. “Make me.”

Harry flipped them over again at the words, body encompassing Louis’ own and caging him in against the bed, flat palms pressed by the sides of his head to keep himself from crushing the boy underneath him. Louis was staring up at him with wide eyes, cheeks flushed because of all the rolling around. Harry supported his body with just one hand, the other moving downwards and raising up the sleeve that had slipped off of Louis’ shoulder, thumb rubbing against his soft skin for a second before he placed it correctly again. “Are you wearing my sweater, baby?”

A beat passed between them before Louis replied. “No.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

Harry hummed, fingers pinching the black material. “Looks a lot like it.”

Louis’ jaw tightened at his words, squirming under him to try and sit up, hands tugging at the bottom of the oversized sweater. “If you wanted it back you should’ve just said so.”

“When did I say that?” Harry released the sweater to take hold of Louis’ wrists, stopping the boy from taking it off. “Hey. Don’t get upset.”

“‘M not upset.”

“Then?”

Louis turned around, face squished against the pillow underneath him. His voice was muffled when he replied. “It’s nothing.”

Harry finally let himself fall on top of Louis, chest pressed tightly against his back. “For the record,” he slid his arms in between Louis’ body and the mattress, clutching him even closer. He could feel his heartbeat under his hands. “I think it looks amazing on you.”

“Yes?”

“Mhm.” A few seconds passed, in which Harry placed a kiss on the side of Louis’ neck. “You can raid my closet all you want, baby. Hope you know that.”

Louis’ head turned sideways, making Harry raise his own until there was a single blue eye looking at him nervously. “Why?”

 _Because when I see you dressed up in my clothes it feels like you’re mine, even if it’s just for a moment._ “Because I know you get cold easily and if my clothes can avoid that, then so be it.”

“Always taking care of me, Harry.”

He could feel Harry beaming at his words on the curve of his neck, smile pressed smugly against it. “There’s nothing else I’d rather do, baby.”

Harry raised up slightly, letting Louis turn around again when he started complaining about how he was bending his neck sideways and it would hurt him a lot later if he kept it that way. Their faces got closer then, Harry’s forehead resting on top of Louis’, pretty blue eyes looking up at him like he was the only thing they would ever see. He let one of his hands move to cup Louis’ cheek, covering all of it softly, the pad of his thumb caressing Louis’ bottom lip when he pouted slightly at the touch. Something warm was bubbling up inside him as he dipped down a bit, Louis’ eyes fluttering closed with the movement.

Harry’s thumb had barely moved underneath Louis’ jaw to tilt it up towards his face when there was a loud crash coming from beside the bed, faces snapping towards the sound that broke the spell they had been under, Louis being the first one to gasp indignantly. “Andy! _What the fuck?”_

There was a mess on the floor, one of the cups Louis used to clean his brushes while painting broken in a million pieces. Harry’s eyes went from looking at him, to looking at the pointy pieces again to Andy, who hissed at him when their eyes met, ears thrown back angrily.

He sat back, Louis getting up and cooing at the black cat while he approached it, trying to reprimand it but failing as he reached down to pet him, tiptoeing around the broken glass. Harry could barely make out what Louis was saying, only bits and pieces reaching his ears as Andy meowed back at the boy as if he could understand the complaints coming out from its mouth.

It was scary, cause Harry knew the cat hated him.

He wasn’t even exaggerating, those words being the ones that had been used by Louis when he asked out of curiosity one time why Andy always seemed to scratch at his clothes angrily whenever he went to his place, the cat getting its claws out every single time.

Harry was almost sure the meows meant something that went like _‘kick him out of my house’,_ yellow eyes squinted angrily as it continued making noises at Louis, who kept petting at its head and neck softly. He stood up, clearing his throat. “I’m gonna go for something to clean this up.”

“You don’t have to.” Louis’ reply was quick, attention shifting towards him immediately. Harry could feel Andy’s gaze snap from Louis towards him as it heard his voice, staring him down coldly.

“I’ve got it.” 

When he got back with a bunch of newspapers under one arm and a broom in the other Louis had climbed up the bed again, one hand petting Andy softly while the other was hidden underneath the sleeves of Harry’s sweater. He didn’t think much of it as he picked up the broken cup and wrapped the pieces carefully with the newspaper, walking inside the bathroom to throw the bunch into the trash can.

However, he _did_ think something about it when he sat down next to an Andy-less Louis and he noticed his hand was still hidden, moving it away softly when Harry turned towards him, the movement making him frown. “What happened?”

Louis shook his head, his eyes not quite meeting Harry’s. “Nothing.”

The boy reached out for his hand gently, settling it atop his lap. Louis had curled it into a small fist, Harry’s long fingers unclasping them carefully. When he got to the pointer one he raised his eyes from it to Louis, catching him trying to hide a grimace. “Oh, baby…”

“I said I was gonna clean it.”

“Why would I let you do it when it was _my_ fault that Andy knocked it down?”

Harry didn’t wait for a reply, going to the bathroom and returning with a tiny box Louis kept there with basic stuff for first aid. He took out some bandaids and poured alcohol into a cotton ball, chuckling under his breath when he grabbed Louis’ finger and he started complaining, a small chorus of _no, Harry, I’m okay, really_ being heard in the room.

He cleaned the cut with gentle movements, the smaller boy beside him hissing whenever he applied too much pressure. Harry finished quickly, wrapping it up with a bandaid before pressing a kiss on top of it. “There. Good as new.”

Louis’ eyes were soft when they found his. “I’m sorry, Harry.”

“For what, baby?”

“Because Andy hates you.”

“Andy’s just jealous.” Harry laced their fingers together absentmindedly. “Besides, it’s you who it gets jealous over. Can’t really complain when I have been in that place too.”

He didn’t realise what he had said until some seconds in silence passed, Louis opening his mouth and closing it for a while before his voice came out, head tilting. “You have?”

Harry didn’t say anything, cheeks starting to tint red just like Louis’ were. Louis mapped out his face with his eyes, noticing how he seemed to think something over inside his head. He was about to ask him what it was when he scooted closer to him and pressed a soft close mouthed kiss against his lips.

Louis’ eyes widened as it happened, the moment being over in the blink of an eye. He took a breath in with his mouth, wondering if he had hallucinated it because of how _much_ he actually wanted it to happen or if he was dreaming, Harry standing up from his place on the bed and placing his hands on Louis’ cheeks, a hint of nervousness underneath his voice. “Let’s make dinner, I’m starving.”

Louis could only nod, a small _yeah_ mumbled in silence, voice gone for it to be any louder than that, mind whirring confusedly as he saw Harry turn around and leave the room, deep voice echoing around the flat when he said _‘sorry, Andy’_ while passing the cat in the hall.

_What on earth did just happen?_

[ ♡ ]

Harry opened his door, small hands pushing at his chest aggressively as soon as he did so. He took a step back, not expecting the movement. 

“What’s wrong with you?”

It was Louis. 

He let himself be pushed more inside his flat before throwing the door forwards so it shut, eyes going back to Louis as soon as he heard the click of the handle. “What?”

The boy whined in that complaining way that Harry liked so much. “You just don’t _kiss_ someone in the most chaste way possible and then just… just… focus on school! Like, I know you have exams, I have exams too and I know we didn’t see each other after that happened but still…” Louis was rambling, hands pushing at Harry’s chest everytime he stuttered. “You didn’t kiss me goodbye after that and now I can’t focus on anything because of… because of _it_. Have you even _thought_ about it?”

Harry felt his insides melt at the perfect picture that Louis painted, blushing cheeks and words jumbling together. “If you _ever_ believe for a second that I don’t spend all my days thinking about you, you’re very, _very_ wrong, Louis.”

Louis’ mouth opened, cheeks going even redder. “You can’t say that to me and expect me to not want to… to…” He trailed off, the conversation being way too overwhelming for the way he was feeling, heart thumping loudly inside his chest. 

Harry shot him a curious look after hearing his words.

“Is there something you wanna tell me, baby?”

Louis’ fingers tangled on his jumper, clutching at it almost painfully. “No.”

“You sure?”

Harry walked him backwards, feet dragging on top of the wood floor beneath them until he had Louis pressed against the closed door of his flat, wide blue eyes looking hazedly up at him in a way that made him want to take him by the neck and finally, _finally_ kiss him deeply like he had been craving to do for weeks.

It was torture.

He waited until Louis let out a shaky breath at their proximity, one of Harry’s hands going up to press against the door, palm open. He was practically caging him in, Louis’ lips parting when he noticed it.

“Harry…”

The boy ignored him, nosing down his temple until he reached the highest point of his cheekbone, pressing a small kiss there. “Tell me what you want.”

He continued kissing down his cheek, just tiny pecks that had Louis squeezing his jumper tightly between his hands, tugging him in closer with the grip. “Harry.”

“Tell me, baby.” 

Louis wasn’t expecting for the nickname to roll off of Harry’s tongue like it was the only thing he was meant to be called like instead of his name. He wasn’t expecting for his knees to go weak at it, feeling like jelly even after he had heard him call him the same way before. But this time it was different. It had _intent_ behind it.

And he also wasn’t expecting for Harry’s chaste kisses to turn into open mouthed ones as they reached his jawline, spit making goosebumps rise onto his skin as the cold air hit the places he left behind as he continued kissing lower, reaching the softest parts of his neck.

He was saying Harry’s name like it was a pledge. Like it was a holy ritual, like his life depended on him repeating that name until it got engraved so deeply into his mind that every time he thought about it the memory of that moment would go back to him and nothing else, the memory of Harry’s lips ghosting on his jawline again before sucking carefully on the part where it met his neck, teeth nipping at the tender skin there.

Louis wanted to cry.

He wanted so many things. He wanted so _much,_ panting as he felt Harry’s teeth graze him a bit harsher than before, moving onto another spot he apparently liked, the one right where his pulse point was. It was beating frenetically, going quicker when Louis felt his big, big ringed hands go down to grab him by the waist and hoist him higher, one of his legs falling between Louis’ parted ones and pressing him even harder against the door, the boy practically riding his thigh as Harry kept kissing on his neck.

“What do you want, baby?”

Louis panted, head thrown back. His voice was reduced to mere mumbles. “Kiss.”

“Here?” Harry kissed on the juncture of his jawline and neck again, making him whine. “Or here?” He dragged his lips softly across his skin, dropping another kiss on his cheekbone, in the same place where they had originally started.

“No…” He muttered, eyes closing. “Oh my God, _Harry._ ”

Harry broke apart. Louis was pouting, pouting in the same way that drove Harry crazy the first few times he caught him doing it. Pouting like he was offering his mouth to be bitten and kissed until he couldn’t breathe anymore.

“Words, baby.”

He finally got Louis to say it when he sucked hard on the point below his ear, teeth nipping at it in the slightest way before he was shaking like putty between his hands. “Kiss me. Please.” 

So he did.

He finally did, mouth latching onto his pouty lips like he had been wanting to do for what felt like ages, a kiss so good and so hard and so full of everything that had been building up between them that felt like it was going to leave their lips bruising after it, bitten raw and red and shiny with spit. 

Louis would be lying if he said he didn’t want it to end up that way.

Harry’s hands around his waist tightened again, hiking him higher when he started to slip down. They broke off with a smooch sound, Louis’ eyelashes fluttering as he opened his glazed over eyes. “So pretty. Prettiest boy in the world.”

He whined high on his throat, body going pliant between Harry’s arms when he raised his hands to grab his cheeks and pry his jaw a bit more open in the slightest, tongue licking inside his mouth like thick honey was sticking on it and he was starving to taste it, thumbs holding his face in place as his fingers tangled themselves in Louis’ hair, as he took and took and took everything the blue eyed boy had inside him, body lax and unmoving except for his lips, which trailed after Harry’s when he broke their kiss off again to breathe in before biting Louis’ bottom lip, suckling on it for a few seconds that made Louis let out a beautiful, needy sound from the back of his throat, mouth falling open after he did. Harry pressed one more open mouthed kiss before separating them, both boys panting slightly while trying to catch their breaths.

“So…” Louis released the hold on his jumper slowly, flattening it against Harry’s chest, looking bashful. “Does this mean you like me back?”

“Baby.” Harry tugged him by the neck again, dropping a soft, close mouthed peck on his lips before speaking. “I think I was already half in love with you when you fell asleep on me.”

Louis squinted at him, red lips the same shade as the blush blossoming on his cheeks. “You’re never gonna let that go, are you?”

“Do you want me to let it go?”

“Hm.” Louis pretended to think about it for a moment before replying. “No. I don’t want you to let go of anything that has to do with me.”

Harry smiled, dimples appearing on his cheeks. “Good, cause I don’t particularly want to, either.”

A beat passed, Louis letting himself fall against the closed door, face nuzzling into Harry’s hands. It made the decision really easy for Harry. It wasn’t like he had much of a choice, either. Since Louis appeared in his life, it was like his heart controlled everything he did instead of his mind. “I’m really in love with you, Louis.”

The blue eyed boy smiled so, so softly up at him it had Harry pressing tiny kisses into his lips as soon after the words left his mouth. “I’m really, _really_ in love with you, Harry.”

[ ♡ ]

They were walking on the same place where they had crossed paths again, freezing air surrounding them and Harry trying to warm Louis up with just his hand, intertwining it with Louis’ smaller one which was cold despite him wearing a big coat and one of Harry’s sweaters underneath it. The weather was much, much colder than the night they met, autumn long gone, but there was something about it hanging in the air that made both of them feel tingly inside.

Harry spoke after a while. “Did I ever tell you I hated buses?”

Louis gave another step forwards before he stopped, turning to face Harry with an incredulous look on his face. “ _Hated?_ What?”

“Yep.”

“How do you even _hate-”_

“Don’t know.” Harry shrugged, tugging Louis closer by the arm with the motion. “I’ve always liked walking way more than being inside cramped places.”

“Ugh.” Louis scoffed playfully, almost turning to continue walking again when he decided against it, brows frowning and head tilting to the side. “But… we met in a bus.”

“Hm, like I said, _hated._ Wonder why I don’t anymore…” Harry mirrored his expression. “Do you happen to know the reason for that change?”

“You’re so…” Louis shook his head, smiling warmly at Harry before they continued walking, swinging their linked hands forwards and back between them. His voice was a soft little thing whenever they were together. It made Harry happy. “Why did you ride it that night, then?”

“Class ran late.”

“Ah…”

“Actually…” It was Harry who stopped them this time, spinning Louis so they were looking at each other. “Since you’re a fierce bus defender and all-”

“ _Hey-”_

“Why did I never see you there again after that time?” Harry’s voice was curious, blushing lightly at the look Louis gave him. “I… kind of looked for you at the bus stop. And in the bus itself. But I never saw you.”

He saw Louis close his eyes, squeezing his lids and throwing his head back. “Oh god.”

“What?”

“I was supposed to take this secret to the grave with me.” He opened his eyes after speaking, a pretty blue finding Harry’s green ones. “I know. I saw you once.”

“Really?” Louis nodded, Harry’s thumb caressing his hand softly. “When?”

“At the stop… but I was really embarrassed.” The boy pouted, long eyelashes framing his eyes prettily. “I mean, you were probably the best good looking boy I had ever seen and I practically used you as a bed too. Not the best first impression.” He laughed when he heard Harry’s laugh, the memory a cute thing only they knew about. “So when I saw you waiting there I just left and I kind of… started avoiding the bus altogether.”

Harry bit his bottom lip looking pensive before raising his eyebrows, as if something had clicked inside his brain. “So it _was_ you who I saw.” He seemed pleased at the thought. “I wasn’t hallucinating.”

“You saw me?”

“I thought I had imagined, but now I’m sure it was you. It’s not like I would forget that shade of blue and soft hair quickly.” Harry reached out for his other hand, tugging him closer when Louis gave it to him. “Do you know what this means?”

“What?”

“That you and I were _destined._ ” Harry lowered his voice in the last word as if it were a secret, making Louis giggle at it.

“So dramatic, Harry.” They both smiled at each other warmly, Harry’s eyes lowering for a second as he looked over at Louis as a whole. Louis had realised it was something he did a lot, checking up on him even when there was nothing he should have been worried about. 

It made Louis feel happier than it should.

He was about to speak again when Harry pushed him backwards softly, untangling their hands to do so. The boy sat him down on one of the benches by their sides, ignoring Louis’ confused face as he kneeled in front of him.

“Are you proposing to me?”

“My proposal is _not_ gonna be on a walkside, baby.” Harry said, looking down as he tied his shoelaces into a tiny bow.

“Where is it gonna be, then?” He reached over, tugging a strand of hair that had fallen into Harry’s face backwards. “What are you?” Louis asked, not really expecting him to answer. “My prince in shining armour?” 

“I’m not telling you, when I propose it’s gonna be a surprise. And no.” Harry’s reply was simple, hands landing atop Louis’ thighs. “But you’re my love. It’s the least I can do.”

Louis whined at him, sounding pained. “You always make me blush, it’s not fair.”

“It’s not my fault you look so pretty when you do.”

“See?” He whined in embarrassment again, making Harry laugh.

They stayed in silence for a few seconds before Harry’s eyes went back at his feet, one of his hands doing the same.

“Hey.” He said, thumb rubbing over the side of one of his converse softly. “I remember this.”

“What?” Louis leaned down a bit to peek at what he was looking at, blush still in place, eyebrows raising when his gaze caught into the black sharpie doodled there. “Oh, that.”

“I really wanted to know what it meant when we met. Caught my eye as soon as I saw it.”

“My. This is embarrassing.” Louis played with his fingers on his lap, hands going to grab Harry’s one that was still there, squeezing it in between his own. “Okay. The night we met… that day wasn’t one of my best days. Actually, it hadn’t been a good day, like at all.” 

Harry’s green eyes blinked up at him patiently. “Why?”

“I was really stressed. _Badly_ stressed. I think that’s also why I fell asleep on you…” Louis trailed off for a second, smiling bashfully at the boy before continuing. “I had to do fittings for a work in one of my classes and I hadn’t found a model until the last minute, was practically running on zero hours of sleep and several cups of coffee. Everything was really messy.”

“I’m sorry you went through that, baby.”

“Oh, it’s okay.” Louis dismissed him with a shrug. “But, at the moment, I thought I could use a reminder of how life is more than some bad days. So I wrote it down on my shoes. And I thought: hey, maybe something good will happen.”

Harry let out a soft laugh at that, terribly endeared by the blue eyed boy. “You blessed your feet?”

“Kind of.” Louis gave him a shy smile, Harry staring fondly up at him.

“How do you read it?” 

“ _Le bonheur est parfois caché dans l’inconnu.”_ Louis knew his french was a bit rusty, but Harry seemed to think he was born to speak like that, gaze shimmering when he heard his accent. Louis laced their hands on his thigh. “It means that happiness is sometimes hidden into the unknown.”

Harry smiled at him, dimples appearing on the sides of his cheeks. “Teach me a phrase in French.”

“Why?” 

“You shared one with me. I wanna say one back to you.”

“Okay. Hm.” Louis seemed to think for a moment, lips pressing together as he did so. His cheeks had turned pink again when he spoke. “Let’s see. _Si tu pouvais…”_

Harry’s smile was even softer when he heard the boy pause to wait for him, repeating the phrase the best he could. “ _Si tu pouvais…”_

_“Lire dans mon cœur.”_

_“Lire dans mon cœur.”_

_“Tu verrais la place…”_

_“Tu verrais la place…”_

_“Où je t’ai mise.”_

_“Où je t’ai mise.”_ Harry finished, chin leaning on Louis’ knee. “What does it mean?”

He laughed lovingly when he saw Louis’ blush deepen, voice so soft he wanted to keep it inside a bottle and take it with him everywhere he went. “Um. It means. If you could read my heart, you would see the place I have given you there.”

Harry felt his own heart tug at the words inside his chest, making him lean up to catch Louis’ lips into a kiss. It wasn’t a heated kiss, but it burnt and made a mark inside of Louis’ body, imprinting itself everywhere it could reach. They broke apart fairly quickly, both of them smiling too much to properly kiss. 

Louis bit his lip, eyeing Harry. “You shouldn’t have asked me to tell you something in french.”

“Why’s that?”

“Because now I wanna hear you speak like that over and over again.”

Harry was sure his smile had been frozen in place, incapable of wiping it off. “Je t’aime, baby.”

“Oh, shut up.”

They both giggled together, Harry looking at Louis like he was the one who hung up the stars in the sky and made the sun rise at dawn, something making his chest feel funny whenever they shared one of those moments.

He spoke again when the giggles calmed down. “Do you think it worked?” 

“What?”

Harry rubbed at his converse again. “The quote, baby.” 

Louis bit his bottom lip as he felt his thumb on top of the sneaker. “Mmmm.” The boy hummed, head tilting and eyes reflecting the moon light shining on them. “I’m pretty sure it did.” He thought about it for a few seconds, eyeing Harry before nodding. “Actually, yes. It did.”

“I think so, too.” Harry stood up, tugging Louis with him and starting walking, happy steps imprinting the pavement underneath their shoes, wind blowing in their direction and messing up their hair. He turned his head to smile at Louis. “I found you like that. Unknowingly.” 

Louis didn't reply, holding tighter onto his hand. He felt so happy he was sure he would burst because of it at any moment.

Harry squeezed his hand back just as tight, rings digging into Louis’ fingers, the smaller one missing from his pinky and instead taking place on Louis’ middle one.

Even when Harry’s hands weren’t the hands of an artist like his own, even when sometimes they felt rough next to his, they were still soft in their own way. And they were strong. And they made him feel safe and loved, and they enveloped his own hands like they were meant to do that and nothing else in the world. Like they belonged together.

“Hey, Harry?”

“Yes, baby?” The boy stopped as soon as he heard his voice, turning to face him with his whole body. 

Louis did the same, raising on his tiptoes until his lips reached Harry’s ear, whispering. “Je t’aime plus.”

And sometimes, that was everything that mattered.

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on [tumblr](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/defencelesst) and you can find the fic post [here.](https://defencelesst.tumblr.com/post/634773292658638848/your-hands-are-tough-but-they-are-where-mine)  
> If you liked it, feel free to comment! :)


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